OPINION: Loving yourself first

When you love who you are you accept yourself without anyone’s validation. Being comfortable in your own skin, knowing your worth, being aware of your limits and loving yourself are vital to a healthier and longer lasting relationship with your significant other.

I firmly believe that you do not need anyone else to meet your expectations but yourself.

“Confidence Is In” display at the CF Toronto Eaton Centre. (Photo by Christiane Beya)

Self-growth will allow you to have more realistic aspirations when it comes to your significant other, so be selfish and focus on your improvement. Self-love is unconditional, fulfilling and strong. It shows patience and independence with a limitless level of confidence. The first step to loving yourself is realizing that you are above any unpleasant situation. It may take awhile for you to fully grasp the concept of building a relationship with yourself and that is OK. It could take you two months or even two years – who knows, maybe more – as long as you are taking the measures to get to know yourself, it does not matter how long your journey takes.

I have seen first hand various relationships where a couple is toxic for each other because of this imbalance. After witnessing these circumstances, I have come to the conclusion that an essential factor in any bond is stability. A healthy relationship occurs when two people are comfortable with themselves and one another. Love progresses when you make your own happiness the top priority.

Finding love within yourself starts with realizing your worth. Once you have accepted that you are worthy of remarkable things and exceptional treatment, then you will respond accordingly.

You attract the things that you love, and positive vibes will naturally start to gravitate towards you when you open these doors for yourself. After all, you are a product of your environment. Unless you can foresee every aspect of the future, no one knows what the outcome of a relationship will be. All you can do is try and hope for the best.

My advice for those who are reading this is to not lose sight of yourself in a committed relationship. Remember the foundation you have built for yourself: your self-discipline, your love, and your well being, and do not let anyone take that away from you. If you are in a relationship with someone who is trying to dim your confidence, then it might be time for you to rethink, re-evaluate and vacate.

So, to anyone that has been in a relationship or is currently in one: if you are searching for yourself in someone else, now is the time for you to start taking care of yourself, because when everything’s said and done no one will love you as much as you do.

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